Chapter 248: Showing Off

**Dao G*ui Yi Xian**

Yang Xiaohai, deep in sleep, opened his eyes. He looked at the ox-hide tent above him, a baseless chuckle escaping his lips.

A foul-smelling foot kicked out from beside him. "What's wrong with you? Why aren't you getting up at this hour, just lying there giggling?"

Yang Xiaohai sat up, excitedly looking at Gouwa beside him, who was rubbing his boogers with his eyes closed.

"Brother Cao Cao, we don't have to do any work now, and we get to eat meat every day! Shouldn't that make us happy?"

This was real meat! It was the first time in his life he'd eaten so much meat he was stuffed. Even the emperors people talked about must live like this.

"Look at you, so easily pleased! A few meals of meat make you this happy. Kids are kids, after all."

He was different; he had higher aspirations.

Gouwa sat up, ran a hand over his face, then climbed out of bed. He patted Gao Zhijian's leg, who was snoring nearby.

"Idiot, time to get up! I reckon we'll be leaving in a few days."

"Leaving already?" Yang Xiaohai's face showed clear reluctance.

"Brother Li has recovered from his hysteria, of course, we're leaving! What? Do you want to live here forever?"

Yang Xiaohai mumbled softly, lowering his brows. "It wouldn't be so bad to live here forever."

"Hey! You really think this is your home, don't you? You're a guest here now; that's why they're serving you hand and foot. Stay a few more days, and they'll start throwing plates and chairs at you!"

After lecturing Yang Xiaohai, Gouwa saw that Gao Zhijian was still asleep. He directly pulled off his blanket, grabbed his underwear, and yanked it down.

Seeing the sleepy-eyed Gao Zhijian frantically grabbing his pants, Gouwa chuckled strangely and dashed out of the tent.

After stepping out of the tent, Gouwa stepped barefoot into the river and began to wash himself thoroughly.

He hadn't been this diligent with his grooming before, but he'd heard Xiaoman say that women liked clean men, which is why he was doing it now.

"Your face is patchy, white and yellow, and you look like a rat. If you get any dirtier, you might as well just die." Those were Chun Xiaoman's exact words.

Gouwa thought about it and realized she had a point. So he started grooming himself diligently.

And sure enough, after he started washing himself more often, some of the bandit women actually started talking to him more.

He had to step up his game because the Qingqiu people in the tent camp had started to flirt. This made Gouwa even more anxious.

He wasn't afraid of picking up leftovers; he was only afraid that everyone else would be taken, leaving him with no one.

After thoroughly washing himself inside and out, and unfastening his waistband to urinate into the river,

Gouwa pulled out a crumpled red flower from his chest, stuck it behind his ear, and swaggered back towards the tents.

Just as he entered the tent camp, Gouwa spotted Li Huowang's back. He was about to grin and go over to say hello when he saw the other man tinkering with various scattered and unsettling torture instruments.

"Ugh... What is Brother Li up to now?"

Gouwa couldn't be bothered to stir up trouble, so he stealthily slipped past him.

He didn't go directly to the women's tents. Instead, he first went to the entrance of the Lü Family Troupe's tent, standing outside and quietly calling, "Scholar! Scholar!"

"Coming! Coming!"

A moment later, Lü Xiucai, with milk clinging to his upper lip, rushed out. "Let's go. I've finished eating."

The two walked together towards the women's tents, chatting as they walked.

"Well? Don't you think my flower looks good?"

"Why would a man wear a flower? Only women wear flowers."

"Why can't men wear flowers? Where I'm from, men who wear flowers are the ones sought after by unmarried maidens."

When they reached the outside of the women's tents, they didn't go straight in. Instead, they waited quietly for something.

Their feet might have rested, but their mouths certainly didn't. Squatting there, they shamelessly discussed which of the women had good looks, big butts, and big breasts.

Although their relationship might not have been particularly close, they found common ground on this topic.

As the sun climbed higher in the sky, the women finally emerged from inside. Each carrying their clothes, they went together to the river to wash.

"Hey, they're out, they're out! Quick, follow them!"

Gouwa spat twice into his palm, then smoothed down the hair at his temples. He then walked after them with a grin.

Seeing the two swaggering over, the women weren't scared. They gathered together, discussing something, and occasionally letting out soft chuckles.

"That! When the moon hangs over the willow, people meet...after noon!"

Lü Xiucai's loud shout startled Gouwa. It also drew the attention of the group of women.

"Scholar, what are you even saying?"

"I don't know either; I only know that one line. My dad said women nowadays like cultured men."

Gouwa gave him a contemptuous look. He smoothed the flower behind his ear with a hand and leaned closer to the women with a grin.

Soon, they reached the riverside. And surprisingly, Gouwa really hit it off with them.

After all, it had been many days. They naturally knew what kind of person Gouwa was: he only dared to flirt with words.

At first, Gouwa thought the flower behind his ear was working its magic. But after a while, he realized they were actually asking him about Gao Zhijian.

Just then, a group of bare-chested Qingqiu men galloped past from the front, drawing gasps and exclamations from the women.

After circling twice, one of the Qingqiu men suddenly led his horse, stepping through the water. He grinned foolishly at a wide-mouthed woman and extended his hand to her.

"Go on, he's a good man! Look at his arms!"

"Yeah, Lan'er, didn't you say last night that you liked him too?"

"We can't be picky anymore, Lan'er."

When they saw the woman named Lan'er being helped onto the horse, both men and women erupted in cheers and jeers.

"What's so special about that? What's so special?" Gouwa's face was filled with disdain.

"That! When the moon hangs over the willow, people meet...after noon!"

"Alright, Scholar, stop howling! You've been wailing for an hour! Has anyone even given you a proper look?"

Gouwa looked at the young man beside him with utter disgust. He shouldn't have come with him today; he was completely useless.

"I refuse to believe it! I won't let that dark-skinned dwarf steal my thunder!"

Gouwa thought for a moment. He pulled out a small wooden tube from his waist. Then he took out a needle wrapped with white thread and inserted it into the tube's end.

"Ahem! Ahem! Ladies, behold! This is a divine power I learned from a true immortal! This isn't just anything; this is divine power~"

Seeing everyone's eyes turn to him, Gouwa's face became even more smug. He then began to show off with the tube.

"Heh heh~ What's so great about riding a horse? Can it compare to this?"

"Watch closely, and don't blink! This isn't something just anyone gets to see!"

As Gouwa spoke, he led a sheep over. He placed the wooden tube to his mouth and sharply inhaled, aiming at the sheep's head.

The next moment, his face immediately turned crimson, and he frantically clutched his throat with both hands, struggling for breath.

Crack!